Hedgehogs, Echidnas, and Foxes! Oh My!
by Noma the Fox
Summary: Everyone acts like an idiot, so please have fun. Edited. xD R&R!
1. Tails Quickly Dies!

Hedgehogs, Echidnas, and Foxes, Oh my!

An Exciting Tale By

Noma the Fox

Here. A Sonic the Hedgehog story by yours truly. xD I'm very bored, and need a fun way to cure that boredom. I'm just gonna put a bunch of random stuff, and yeah. Sonic will be curious, Knuckles will punch things (Like always),Tails will lick things under the sink, and Shadow will have cookies. Note; I don't own Sonic. ;-; Nor do I own Donkey Kong. Or Disneyland. Or... any Disney characters. Whoo.

Forward, march!

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This was quite the scene. Somehow, Shadow managed to get his own house, and everybody was there. Sonic, Shadow, and Knuckles were all playing video games. Not being typical and playing one of their own, but playing Donkey Kong.

"Go up! Go up! Go up! Go up! Go up! Go up!" Knuckles screamed over and over.

Shadow threw the controller at Knuckles, "How am I supposed to do a single damned thing when you keep screaming at me to do things?!?!" He stomped off to the kitchen.

He found Tails under the sink, licking at things. "Sonic... Why is that fox boy licking things under the sink..?"

They both heard Sonic scream, "Tails! Stop licking things under the sink!"

Tails screamed back, "But it tastes so good!" He continued licking.

Sonic walked in, "Tails, if you don't stop licking, you're going to die. 'Cause that stuff is really bad for you."

The little fox gasped, "I don't want to die!! **I don't want to die!!!!!**"

"Haha, too bad, kid! You're gonna die anyways!!" Knuckles laughed his head off.

Suddenly, Tails flew back and died.

Everyone blinked.

"S-so... What now?" Sonic asked.

Shadow grinned, "Wanna go terrorize the children down at the park?"

"I do I do!!!" Knuckles laughed more as he punched his fists.

Sonic jumped in the air, "Yeah! Let's go terrorize children!"

Soo, they went off to terrorize children down at the park. They had a grand time, too. Knuckles pounded a kid's head into the sand, Sonic made a few dizzy by running around them really fast, and Shadow pushed a bunch off the jungle gym. But after the last child pushed, they were pushed out themselves. The parents weren't too pleased with jacked-up children.

Knuckles complained as they walked down the sidewalk, "I'm bored! Let's find something to do! Are you guys hungry? Wanna get something to eat? How 'bout we get tacos! I love tacos! Did you know tacos come from Mexico? I've never been to Mexico! I heard it's really dirty. Dirty places aren't fun. Did you know I protect the Master Emerald? I don't know where it came from. I don't know why I have to be the one to protect it, either. Where did I come from? Aside from Angel Island? Did my parents die or something? How can I be the last living echidna when there's a whole little clan? And what about..."

Shadow picked up a rather large rock and threw it at Knuckles' head, causing him to pass out. "That'll teach him for taking my cookies."

Sonic glanced over to the knocked-out echidna, then to the black hedgehog. But then he looked back at the echidna, because he looked so pretty lying there. "Er... what?"

Shadow sighed, "He took my cookies."

"He did?"

"....Yes, he did."

"Well where did he put the box?"

"Uhh.. I dunno."

"Can I have some cookies?"

"Once I find where the box is."

"What kind are they?"

"Chocolate chip."

"Okay! Let's go find the cookies!"

They then went to Angel Island, leaving Knuckles behind. Only to find those precious cookies.

Sonic and Shadow ripped around through Knuckles' house to find zee cookies, but didn't succeed.

Shadow stood up, "How much do you want to bet they're next to the Master Emerald?"

Sonic, "I'll bet you 10 dollars!!"

"You're on!" Shadow screamed, with the dollar sign in his eyes.

The hedgehogs went off to shrine of the Master Emerald. "Damned lazy echidna, not doing his job." Shadow said. But sure enough, the cookies were right under the Emerald.

Shadow jumped and pointed at Sonic grinning his head off, "Ha! You owe me ten dollars!"

Sonic looked left and right, "Are you sure it was me who promised that?"

Shadow put his arm down and frowned, "What're you saying?"

Sonic threw his arm around Shadow and smirked, "What if someone tricked you into thinking it was me, just to steal your cookies?"

Shadow gasped, "They wouldn't!" He huggled his cookies.

"Oh, they would. They would, Shadow."

"Well... Then what should I do?"

"Go beat the living hell out of Robotnik."

"W-why?"

"'Cause he's the one who wants your cookies."

"Hey! Shouldn't you try to trick Knuckles? He's the gullible one!"

"Er... But they're _your_ cookies, correct?"

"Gasp! You are SO right!"

"So what're you gonna do now..?"

"Beat the living hell out of Robotnik!"

"Hooray!"

Right then and there, Shadow managed to use Chaos Control to get to Robotnik. Even though he didn't have any Chaos Emeralds. I guess he was just that magical. Anywho, once he got there, he automatically beat Robotnik half to death.

Robotnik pushed Shadow aside, "What in God's name is going on?! Why are you attacking me?!?!?"

Shadow simply said, "You took my cookies."

Robotnik yelled, "Why would I take your damned cookies?? And how? They're right there in your hands!"

Shadow looked at his left hand. Robotnik was right, the cookies were in his hand.

"Well... You still took them."

Robotnik blinked, "...No, I didn't."

Shadow got all angry, "Well then who did?"

"....No one took them, Shadow."

"Well... What am I supposed to do now?"

"Go beat the living hell out of Sonic."

"W-why?"

"Urk... 'cause I said so."

"Wait! Deja vu! Or whatever the hell that thing is."

Robotnik stared at him, "What?"

Shadow clenched his fists and jumped, "Yes! I've done this before! Oop, now if you'll excuse me, I have to go pick up Knuckles off the sidewalk. He's been there for quite the amount of time." He then used Chaos Control again, without the Chaos Emerald.

"How did he do that? He doesn't have any Chaos Emeralds!"

Aaaanywho, Shadow went off to get Knuckles off the sidewalk. When he actually got there, Knuckles was being kicked at by little kids.

"Hey you dopey kids! What're you doing to my friend?"

The children looked at him, one spoke up, "We're kicking this red guy, 'cause he looks kickable."

Shadow thought about this, and then started kicking at Knuckles. A few minutes later and after much kicking, Knuckles finally woke up.

"Err.. Wha? What happened?"

Shadow smiled, "I knocked you out, and now a bunch of kids and I are kicking at you!"

Knuckles got all pissed, then punched the children away.

Shadow started crying, "But they were such lovely children!"

Knuckles punched Shadow in the face, "Oh well."

Shadow rubbed his cheek, "Where's Sonic?"

Knuckles glared, "Er.. How am I supposed to know? I've been knocked out."

"Oh. Should we go find him?" Shadow questioned.

"I guess. But where would we look?" Knuckles asked.

"How 'bout that one place that he really really likes?"

"You mean Disneyland?"

"Yeah! Yeah! That place. Let's go see if he's there."

Knuckles wondered, "_Why is it we've spent most of this story just finding things and stuff?_"

Shadow answered, "_'Cause we're just that magical._"

Knuckles stared, "What the hell?!"

"I can read minds." Shadow giggled.

"Urk.. O-kay..."

Knuckles kicked Shadow in the shin, then they went off to Disneyland to find Sonic. But, they didn't search for Sonic, they went on as many rides as possible. Theeen, they went off to find their happy blue friend.

"Do you think Sonic is even here?" Knuckles asked as he shoved some cotton candy down his throat.

Shadow put his hands behind his head, "Doubt it. I just wanted to come here because it makes me happy. Ooh, look! There's Goofy!" He ran over to Goofy and tackled him, "Oh Goofy! You rock!"

Knuckles walked up to them, "You know he's just a guy in a costume, right, Shadow?"

Shadow glared, "Nu uh! This is the real deal, man!" He snuggled as the helpless character groaned.

Knuckles put one hand on his shoulder, then ripped the head off, "See?" The man looked frightened.

Shadow stopped what he was doing. What he saw was indeed a man in a costume. So, both Shadow and the children around them started crying. The parents and workers glared at the echidna. "What?!" They threw him out, 'cause it's bad to rip off the head of cartoon characters. It made the children, and Shadow, oh so very sad.

Shadow sniffled, "Why did you do that?"

Knuckles crossed his arms, "To show that it wasn't the real thing."

Suddenly!!!! Sonic popped up. "Hey guys!"

Knuckles smacked Sonic, "Where have you been??"

Sonic smiled, "Disneyland."

Both Shadow and Knuckles fell, all anime style. "Why didn't you tell us?!"

Sonic grinned and laughed, "I didn't want to 'cause I had to go see Mickey!"

They fell over again. Shadow stood up and smacked Sonic, "You should know it's just a stupid guy in a costume!"

Sonic gasped, "Nu-uh! He's real!"

Out of the blue, Mickey Mouse appeared. "Ho ho! Hello!"

Knuckles blinked, "It's fake. Watch." He tugged on Mickey's ear, it didn't move. "What the hell?" He pulled at it over and over.

"Ow! You son of a bitch!" Mickey tackled Knuckles and starting beating him senseless. Knuckles fought back, so Mickey lost.

"Sayonara!" Knuckles yelled as he threw Mickey.

Sonic got on his knees, "_NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO_!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Shadow hugged Sonic, "It'll be okay, blue hedgehog. It'll be okay."

Sonic sniffed, "It will?"

"I don't know, I just felt like saying that."

"Oh."

"Shadow.."

"Yes?"

"I think the story's over. Noma can't think of anything else to write."

Shadow started crying, "But it can't end! I love it so much!"

Knuckles smiled and waved, "That's all, folks!"

END.  
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Okay. I totally ran out of ideas for this story, so that's good enough.


	2. Eggs! Wait! NOT THAT KID AGAIN!

Hedgehogs, Echidnas and Foxes! Oh My!

Another chapter by me!

Here... Have fun. No small summary thingy. OH! Wait! There are going to be THREE shocking suprises! It's like a genie who gives surprises instead of wishes!

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Now, the three were on Angel Island, sitting around the Shrine of the Master Emerald. Sonic kept poking at Shadow, which made Knuckles cry.

"Sonic, stop being so mean to Shadow!" He threw his arms around the blue hedgehog and cried on his shoulder.

Sonic blinked, "Okay." Then started poking at Knuckles. It made Knuckles giggle.

Shadow glared, "Hey! You were poking me! Now don't make me go evil on you!"

"Like you haven't done it before." Knuckles crossed his arms.

Shadow blinked, "Ehh.. You're right. So what do we do now?"

Sonic smiled, "Wanna go terrorize children in the park?"

The two shook their heads. "We already did that." Shadow said.

Sonic frowned, "Well you two think of something. I would be hanging out with Mickey Mouse, but Knuckles punched him into the distance."

Knuckles sighed with happiness, "That was great."

"...Anywho..."

"Oh oh! I know!" Shadow waved his hand in the air.

"Yes?" Sonic pointed at Shadow.

Shadow put his hands between his legs, "Uhmm... mmmmmm... ummm.... I gotta go to the bathroom." He got up and did a little potty dance.

Knuckles pointed to a potty, conviently placed at the bottom of the Shrine.

Shadow ran down. Sonic tugged at Knuckles' dreadlocks, "Wanna go do something nasty?"

Knuckles blinked, "Like what?"

Sonic smirked, "Like throw eggs at Amy and Rouge."

Knuckles jumped up, "You mean the bat girl too?! HELL YES!"

So they ran off to do so.

Shadow came out, went back up the shrine and looked around, "Where'd they go?" He got all sad.

Rouge and Amy were for some reason hanging out together. Rouge pulled her ear down and began gnawing on it, and Amy just plain sat there drooling.

Rouge stopped, "This is boring."

Amy drooled all over her dress, "Geeer..."

"...Yeah."

"Geeeeeer.."

"Umm..."

"GEEEEEEER"

"Ahh!"

Amy tackled Rouge and began beating her up. A crowd of guys came, but then left when they realised Amy was there. And, after a few minutes, Rouge was sitting on Amy.

She smiled that certain smile she always did, "Now I'm even more bored." She got up and kicked Amy aside.

Suddenly, Sonic and Knuckles came in carrying two bags of eggs.

Knuckles grinned evilly.

"W-why're you looking at me like that? And what's in those bags?" She said.

The hedgehog and the echidna pulled out an egg, and began firing at the bat and the... other hedgehog.

The whole scene went in slow motion, Rouge screamed, and Knuckles laughed his head off. Sonic didn't do much, except throw eggs at Amy's head.

Amy woke up, "Hmm?" She touched at her head. "...Ewww..." She tried to lick it off.

Sonic cackled, "Take this!" He got her right in the middle of her forehead.

A while later, everyone was lying on the floor exhausted. So many eggs, so little time.

Shadow walked in, "What's everyone doing?" He smiled.

Sonic made an attempt to move, "We had... a war.. and yeah..." He managed to move to Shadow, where he pushed him into a pod that appeared out of the blue.

Shadow touched at the glass and screamed, "Sonic!"

Sonic crawled over to a little... table thingy that had a lever on it. On his way over, he crawled over Rouge, smearing the eggs on her outfit.

"Sonic!!!"

Sonic smiled, "Shadow... Give the people a chance... to be happy.."

"Sonic, no!"

Sonic pulled the lever, and Shadow fell into space. "Sayonara... Shadow the Hedgehog..."

Knuckles got up, "Dude, what was that about?"

Sonic jumped up with happiness, "I don't know. I just wanted to see what it'd be like to be Maria for once."

"...How'd he even manage to fall into space, anyways?"

"Not a clue, my friend. Not a single clue."

Shadow was sitting inside the pod, thinking, thinking. "How'd he even manage to pull this off? ...And why was he acting like Maria?" He paused. "Oh, Maria!" He began crying.

The pod fell to Earth, managing to stay in tact and keep the black hedgehog alive. He came out of the pod to see a bunch of people who had automatically surrounded him.

A woman screamed, "Oh my gosh!"

Shadow rubbed his head, "Err... What the?"

A man came up to him, "Now... Are you alright little guy?"

Shadow looked up at him, "Well... I could go for some cookies.. WAIT!"

He pushed people aside, only to find Christopher Thorndyke. "Oh, crap."

Chris smiled stupidly, "SHADOW!!! YOU'RE ALIVEEEE!!!"

Shadow flew back, "Fantastic."

Knuckles paced the floor, "Where do you think he is?"

Sonic sat on a stool, in a position like that one statue of the guy thinking. "I hope he's with that Chris kid."

Knuckles shuddered at the very thought.

Sonic stood infront of a computer, "If only I knew how to work this damned thing." He pushed the buttons on the keyboard, which made the computer get an error and blow up. "...Good thing Tails isn't alive."

"S-should we go to Station Square and look?"

"I'd rather go to the Mystic Ruins. That place is cooler. And Big lives there!"

Knuckles rubbed his chin, "Yeah.. But it's got that really annoying music of the woman and the man who are like "Eeelay! Oh ee oh, ee oh.' and 'Yuyaaayoleeleh!!'"

Sonic sighed, "You're right. Fine, let's go to Station Square. They have cooler music anyways."

"Yay!"

Shadow was sitting on the couch while Chris asked him tons of annoying little questions. God, he hated that kid so much.

"So Shadow, where were you all this time? Did you get hurt? I thought you died! What happened to Maria? Why is it when we were on ARK you stared outside all the time then stared at me? Huh? Huh? HUH HUH HUH HUH HUH??? Where is Maria, anyways? Is she on vacation? Wait, I remember. Oh.. OH. Nevermind. Umm. I wanna dance. Do you want to dance? What do you think of Ella? Do you think she's fat? I think she looks like a cow. Cows are neat. Do you eat meat? I do. I have to. If I don't, Mr. Tanaka beats me with a stick and tells me to eat it. Wanna see a bruise?"

Shadow glared, "Do you ever shut up?" He got his little attitude back.

Chris grinned, "No."

Shadow sighed.

Mr. Tanaka came in with a plate full of meat, while holding a stick. "Eat your meat." He squinted an eye.

Shadow watched as Chris ran into a corner, "You'll never take me alive!"

Mr. Tanaka ran over to him and started beating him.

"Er... Yeah... I think I'm gonna go now..." He started to back torwards the door.

Chris jumped up, with some peices of meat falling from his mouth. "Wait, Shadow!! I WURVE YEW!!" He made an attempt to run, but got smacked in the head with the stick.

"Meat is good for you." Mr. Tanaka frowned.

Sonic and Knuckles were walking down the street, searching for Shadow. Knuckles was dancing to the music that was playing, 'cause it was so spiffy.

All of the sudden, Big popped up. "Eeerrrr... Wha?" He tilted his head.

Knuckles blinked, then whispered to Sonic, "I don't like this guy."

Sonic whispered back, "....I barely know who he is."

Knuckles replied, "You know what? Neither do I."

Big put his head in between theirs and whispered, "Do you guys know where Froggy is?"

Sonic slapped Big, "You lost him again?"

Big nodded.

Sonic looked around, "He went that way."

Big looked around and ran off.

"Well.... That was, easy.." Sonic said.

Then as they were about to enter Casinopolis, they bumped into that oh so wonderful black hedgehog.

"GUYS! I FINALLY FOUND YOU!" He tackle-hugged them.

Knuckles threw him off, "Where the hell have you been?"

Shadow looked around him then whispered, "With that stupid Chris child."

The two fell to the ground laughing.

Shadow glared, "S-shut up! It was horrible!"

Chris came in running, screaming his head off.

Shadow freaked, and hid behind them, "SEE! He's STALKING meeee!!!"

"Shadow! SHADOW!! COME LIVE WITH MEEE FOREVEEER!! Wait, Sonic? Knuckles?! EVEN BETTER!" He picked up all three of them at once and ran off.

As Chris was carrying them, Knuckles had whispered, "What should we do?"

Sonic smirked, "I'll start running really fast, and you punch Chris in the face."

"SWEET."

Then they did so, and got away. Shadow complained about the fact that that wasn't too creative, but at least he was away from that snot nosed punk.

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Hey! I said there were three surprises! So why did the story end? Well, I didn't say they were each going to be in this chapter, did I? I'll just say, someone appears, then four more characters appear. TRY TO GUESS WHO THEY BE!


	3. The Cookies Are Tempting

Hedgehogs, Echidnas, and Foxes! Oh My!

Ah, God! I finally got to watch some new Sonic X. I felt like cracking up, and it put some much needed ideas into me noggin! Are you prepared for the next chapter? You better be, bitches! This is really weird. 9:37 in the mornin'... watched some Sonic, drinkin' Dr. Pepper and like... eating brownies with chocolate sprinkles. I am SO hyped up right now.

By the way, NOMA DOESN'T OWN SONIC OR ANYONE. Wanted to make that clear.

HERE WE GOOOOO...

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This time around, Sonic, Shadow and Knuckles were just kickin' back and relaxing. It's something they wanted to do. I mean, why would they want to go on another adventure when they're tired as hell? Really?

"This sucks. Shadow, find something to do." Knuckles did his usual... glare thing at Shadow while punching the back of his head.

"Dude. No. There isn't anything cool to do until Noma decides it. Like when I kicked you..." Shadow stared off into the distance with great happiness.

Sonic sprung up, knocking over his comrades during said action, "I KNOW! Let's go race. Whaddya say? Ah, such good times! Aren't they, though? I think so. Mreee. Mree? AHAHAAAA. That's really weird. You know what? I don't even know what I really wanted to do anymore!" he sat back down and simply smiled.

The black hedgehog and the red echidna both stared at him like he smacked their grandpa.

Anyway...

A crash hit the side of Shadow's house as they were in there. It hit his room, thus ruining all his collectables and nick-nacks he had treasured so.

Shadow jumped, running over to his bedroom door, "Oh GOD no! I don't have any money for repairs or anything! Heaven knows _how I even bought this house_ in the first place!"

There's actually a story behind that... but it's too detailed and most of the content isn't suitable for some viewers. LET'S CONTINUE ON.

Dr. Robotnik came out of some dust and debris, rubbing his head. "Ahh... God damn it."

Knuckles gasped, "Robotnik? What're you doing here!"

Robotnik realized where he was. He shifted himself up and dusted himself off, "Ahem. I'm here to take Shadow back."

"What? Why!" Sonic and Knuckles said.

"Yes! I demand an explaination! 'Specially 'cause I like the life I'm livin' now. No evil shiz to pressure me or nothin'!" Shadow kicked the back of Knuckles' head and stood ontop of him in a pose, with fire shooting in the background.

"Umm.. Well, I noticed Shadow was able to do Chaos Control _without_ a Chaos Emerald..." he began. "So, I figured I best take him back and use him for all sorts of funky evil schemes that I concuct! What do you say, Shadow?"

Shadow rubbed his chin in deep thought, "What would I get from such a bargain?"

"...All the cookies you can eat?"

"AH! Sign me up!" the happy hedgehog clapped and skipped over to the evil scientist.

Robotnik started cackling, "See if you can stop me now, Sonic! Shadow, use Chaos Control and get us outta here."

Shadow nodded and grinned, "Right-o, Cookie Holder!" and at those words, they disappeared.

Sonic and Knuckles stood there in a daze. Shadow really ran off to be evil again? Eh... Oh well.

"Wait, you stupid author! There is no 'Oh well'! You gotta find a way to get Shadow back to us." Knuckles screamed.

But...

"NO BUTS."

Fine. Just let me do some more evil stuff to you two...

Amy had been walking down the street Shadow's house was on. Why? Because she knew Sonic was there. So, she walked down the correct amount of houses until she got there. She had noticed that a quarter of the house had been blown off, and ran in to make sure Sonic-Poo was alright. Beat THAT, Knuckles.

Sonic made a high-pitched shrill of a scream as Amy tackled him, "Oh my God! Why are you torturing _me_! I did nothing!"

'Cause I'm that evil...

"Amagad! Sonic! I love you! So totally and completely love you! Let's go get married and have dozens of children!" Amy said as she carried the poor blue hedgehog away.

Knuckles crossed his arms, watching the two go off into the distance. "You can't really have a story with one character..."

You're obviously forgetting Shadow and Robotnik, my dear simpleton. For that, I'm going to them.

Shadow was skipping around Robotnik's laboratory-thingy trying to find the cookies Robotnik had promised. Things were thrown to the ground, such as equipment and documents.. "_Cookies are more important._"Shadow subconciously repeated to himself.

"Ahh! What the hell? Stop touching things! You're ruining it all!"

Shadow turned from his search, giving Robotnik a cold, evil stare. "I must have those cookies. If I don't recieve them in five seconds, you'll---" a box of cookies smacked him right in the face. "Much better!" he sat down at ate them contently.

Robotnik sighed, "Anyway... Shadow, I need you to infiltrate the military base located just up northeast of my base... thing. You need to go in there, steal some precious jewely for my machines, and the ingredients to the cake I like to bake on Tuesdays. After you've succeeded in those, I want you to set a bomb there that'll give you two minutes to get the fuck out of. Make it inconspicuous this time... Are you getting this, Shadow? Shadow?"

Of course, Shadow wasn't paying attention. The flavor of chocolate-chip was getting the better of his mind.

Robotnik quickly snatched the cookies away, "Do the mission, or you'll never see these again."

Shadow made a soft wimpering noise, "Just one more?"

A swift kick to the rump gave him an answer, "GO. NOW."

"Fine! ...Son of a bitch." Shadow flew across with his arms crossed in an upset manner.

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Well... I'm not too sure about this chapter. But meh, my mind's changed from when I first made this story. Gimme thoughts on what should happen next.


	4. Hunger, Scaries, Loneliness

Hedgehogs, Echidnas, and Foxes! Oh My!

There must be somethin' 'bout Saturday mornings that give me ideas. I'm tired as hell, but that ain't gonna stop me! That's about all I have to say. Soo... here's chapter... four, is it? Yeah. xD

I don't own Sonic & co, or Nickelodeon.

BOO BOO BOO, THERE'S A SONIC OUT TO GET YOOOOU.

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Shadow walked through the base he was ordered to go into. He didn't really like it. It was just as ugly as Robotnik's, so it made him spit in disgust. "Come on, this is all too easy! I've done everythin', now I gotta go set the bomb. Something isn't right!"

Ah... the lad was right. Just as soon as he spoke those words, some freakish giant robot slammed itself down infront of him.

His ears perked forward, "Why does it feel like my spider senses are tingling?" his eyes scanned the surrounding area.

The robot made a cough, trying to point out the obvious.

Shadow walked past the robot, trying to find what was giving him that feeling, "I know it's something... but what?"

The robot got all pissy. He jumped infront of Shadow again, just an inch away. "It's me, you idiot!"

"Hmm... Could it be a robot?" Shadow began rubbing his chin in thought.

The robot slapped Shadow, "Come on! I'm right infront of you!"

"Ow! What the hell?" the hedgehog looked up at the robot, "Oh, hey! When'd you get here?"

"Nevermind about that! I was sent here to kill you.."

"But that's impossible. I'm _invincible_!"

"Would you like to prove that theory?"

"No.."

"No?"

"Yes."

"You would?"

"No."

"...What?"

Shadow fell over, "I'm hungry. Fetch me some cookies, my robot minion!"

The robot smacked Shadow again, "I'm not your minion!"

Shadow sighed, "Well, where am I supposed to get my cookies, then? Robotnik took mine, and I can't fight on an empty tummy."

Robot blinked, "You're working for Robotnik?"

Shadow nodded, "Yuuup."

Robot pulled out his little blaster-ray, and pointed it to Shadow's head, "Then you must be destroyed immediately!"

Anyway, in Amy's prison cell... -- I MEAN HOUSE.

"Oooh, Sonic! This is simply wonderful! You and I can finally wed, and you can devote your entire life to bowing down at my feet with love! It'll be simply devine. Then we'll have like, twelve screaming children whom I'll leave for you to take care of while I go shopping! Wouldn't you like that? I would. Oh, dear, don't try to escape.. you're just going to tighten the rope."

Poor little Sonic wiggled around, "Everyone talks too much in this..."

SUDDENLY. A crash came through the window on the right of them. A boy came flying in, rabies and all. He fixed his hair in an appropriate manner, all slow-motion-pretty-like.

"Oh my God, don't tell me it's Chris!" Sonic made a quicker attempt to escape.

"Amy, what in the flying fuck are you doing to _my_ Sonic?"

Amy put a hand on her hip, "_Your_ Sonic? Boy, I've been chasing after him for _way_ longer than you have."

A bitch-slap fest fell into play. Sonic didn't root for either, he was afraid of those freak shows and wanted to get the hell out. He pushed his feet against the post that helped hold him with all his force. After a strong attempt, he managed to get free.

"Ahahahaha! See you later, sons of bitches!" he jumped out of the window Chris had shattered.

"No! You get your sweet ass back here, hedgehog!" Chris and Amy said at the same time.

Sonic ran all the way to Shadow's house, where he found Knuckles still there for some reason.

"Ah, finally! Where have you been? You know how long I've been sitting here? There hasn't been a single thing to do! ...Well, I kinda was watching this show on Nickelodeon... A child fell into a well. I laughed. Then I went and had a taco, even though it really was a shoe. A brown one. It didn't taste too good, it made me vomit. The vomit tasted bad, like chicken noodle soup. I don't like chickens... They smell like turnips. _SIIIIIINGING A SWEET, SWEET LULLABY..._"

Sonic stared at Knuckles, who sat there with a big smile on his face. "Knux... have you gotten into Shadow's secret stash again?"

"...Mebeh." Knuckles put a hand to his mouth and smiled.

"That's it! You go to your corner, now!"

"B-but.."

"MOVE IT."

Knuckles pushed his chair over and cried, "I hate you! I wish you were never my father!" he ran over to his corner and curled up.

Sonic sighed, "Parenthood sucks.. Wait... what?"

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Whoo! I don't know about this chapter... Oooh, people, incase you're wondering... Knuckles is like, my top favorite character. He's just so damn cute 'n stuff. What do you think is gonna happen to Shadow? Well.. it'd help to read on the next chapter and find out, huh? AHAHA.


	5. The Small Return of the Fox

Hedgehogs, Echidnas, and Foxes! Oh My!

I don't know why I've gotten into this sudden writing phase. But hey, it gives us aaaallllllll something to do, right? I write, you read. 'N... stuff. I think I'll start back up with Shadow, 'cause I can't think of anything with Sonic and Knuckles.

HIGH HO SILVER, AWAAAAAAY!

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Shadow stood in a very still pose while the robot prepared to destroy him. "_Could this be it? Could this be the end of the awesome Shadow the Hedgehog? Aw, hell no! I've got a video game coming soon! And being all serious just plain destorys this story."_

He then decided to regain a really hyper little attitude, and ran off as fast as he could while flailing his arms, screaming about how Ronald McDonald was out to get Count Chocula while eating the brains of that Quaker Oats guy.

"How the hell..?" was all the robot got to say before the base exploded. Yeeey, explosions!

Well, let's go back to Sonic and Knuckles. They were simply sitting there, staring at eachother in deep concentration.

"Chunky monkey." Knuckles said.

"I agree with you, man." Sonic smiled.

"...Maybe."

"Maybe what?"

"Maybe patternashkapooshlasputters."

"...What?"

"..What?"

"...You're really weird."

"Well you're the one who likes to fry his boxers to a burning crisp every other Wednesday!"

"I told you not to mention that out loud!" Sonic cried, pushed over his chair and ran off.

Knuckles sighed, "Ah... parenthood sucks. Wait... Shut up!"

By now, Shadow had reached Robotnik's base of Cookies, Merriment, and Happiness. ...Is that how it goes?

"Aha, Shadow! You lose!" Robotnik slammed his fist on the table and cackled in victory.

Shadow threw the game board over, getting all the game pieces 'n stuff everywhere. "This game sucks, there were no milkmen or goats! Total rip off." he ran into his room and screamed inside a pillow.

Robotnik sighed, "Parenthood sucks... WAIT A SECOND. WE ARE NOT GOING THROUGH THAT AGAIN. Ruining the story, damnit."

Out of completely nowhere, Tails sat up, rubbing the back of his head, "Ugh.. What happened?" he looked around the area, "Oh, God no! I'm alive!"

Why is he alive? Well, because God got tired of him.

After about five or ten minutes of screaming, Sonic and Knuckles finally went into Shadow's kitchen to see what was up. ...He was in that kitchen the whole time? Hot damn. That's disgusting.

"What's going o--oh no, not you again." Sonic folded his arms and sighed, "Why couldn't you just die and stay dead?"

Tails gave him an oh so very cute smile and replied, "Because you love me."

Sonic smacked the back of Tails' head and pointed at a corner, "Sit there and stay there until you die!"

"Aww, okay..." Tails slumped over to the corner.

Sonic nodded, "That's right. It's aaaaaaalways right..." he licked his lips, pulling out a fork and a knife from behind his back, "It's dinner time.."

Knuckles stopped the maniac before he could attack and eat Tails, "Dude! No. Other people love him."

Sonic dropped the utensils, "Alright.. but now what?"

Knux shrugged, "I dunno."

"...Can we go to Disneyland?"

"...After what happened last time, I don't think we can ever go back."

"Oh yes. YES NOW I KNOW. Let's go get Shadow back. He still needs to get his room fixed, anyway."

Knuckles jumped in the air and did a pose like in Sonic Heroes, "Yeah!"

And so, they ran off to retrieve Shadow. They would have been a hell of a lot quicker, had Knuckles not layed down in the grass and fell asleep. That made Sonic feel like leaning down and kissing his sweet little forehead. WAIT. No way. I'm lying... Really, I am. But after all that time, they finally got to Robotnik's base. They slammed down the front doors, and automatically ran to the kitchen, since they knew that's where the two liked to eat.

"Aha! Robotnik, give us Shadow back!" Sonic screamed.

Robotnik dropped his fork, "Never! He's mine now. If he wants cookies, he stays."

Shadow sat in the middle of the floor with a box of cookies infront of him. He stared at the Sonic and Robotnik, who were standing far on each side of him. They called to him, trying to get him to go over to them. "_I wonder what they're saying?_" Shadow said, stuffing more cookies in his mouth.

Robotnik got down to the black hedgehog's level and began knocking on the floor, "Come on, Shadow! Come to daddy!"

Sonic stared, "That ain't right." he looked back at Shadow, "Shadow, get your ass over here. You'll never get anymore cookies if you don't."

Shadow just heard the word "cookies", and automatically jumped to Sonic.

Knuckles picked Shadow up in one hand, "Ha! In your face, Robotnik!" he jumped up and slammed Shadow into the ground, "TOUCHDOWN!"

Sonic and Robotnik stared at Knuckles, then Shadow. But Sonic looked back at Knuckles, because the pretty echidna was smiling. I mean... Oh, shit!

Shadow got up and kicked the living hell out of Knuckles when he pulled himself together, "You bastard!"

Knuckles blocked his attacks with his arms, "Argh! I'm sorry!"

"Sorry doesn't cut it!"

Their fight was interrupted by a freak show child who managed to break into Robotnik's base. He ran in, getting his rabies all over the floor, and swooped Sonic in his arms.

"Sonic is all mine now!" Chris screamed. When he said that, he got a bit o' a lazy eye, which looked scary as hell. He ran out of the base at full speed to take the hedgehog all the way to his torture chamber... I MEAN HOUSE.

Knuckles, Robotnik and Shadow all stood there, deeply thinking about what just happened. Well, mostly thinking about it, anyway..

"_How are we gonna get him back? ...Would Robotnik be willing to help?" _Knuckles pondered.

"_Hahaha! Perfect. Now that that child has Sonic, no one can stop me from taking over the world! It'd be so simple.. All I would hafta do is trick Knuckles into joining my side once again, and simply bribe Shadow with more cookies. We will be unstoppable!" _Robotnik chuckled to himself.

"_...I wonder if that contest for the endless supply of cookies is still running." _Shadow put a finger against his lips curiously.

_"God damn it, hedgehog! Stop obsessing over cookies all the time!" _Knuckles telepathically said.

_"...Huh? You're not supposed to be like that! It's only mmyyyyy power!"_

_"Not anymore!"_

_"Aww..."_

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I don't know what else to put for this chapter... I want the whole Chris and Sonic thing to be in the next chapter. Are y'all happy that Tails is now alive, again? ...Meeeeh...

Oh! Would you guys hate me if I added Noma and Kaido into the story? It could give me some plans for future chapters. And, I must thank you for the support you're giving me. The reviews get me all giddy.


	6. Enter: Mighty the Armadillo

Hedgehogs, Echidnas, and Foxes! Oh My!

...Whoo! Next chapter! Now that I've switched emails, I've been getting more reviews. Oo I've gotten two or three since like, last week. Or something. Yeah...

I don't own Sonic or Tomb Raider.

AHHHHHHHHHH!

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Sonic and Chris were at Chris' house, and of course, the poor hedgehog was tied up tightly to a chair. Chris had spent his time walking around him with lust in his eye, Sonic sat there with his eyes closed, praying for the best.

"Now, now, Sonic... you should just cave in and accept the fact that I love you, and love me back! It's simple, and I won't have to do anything you don't like."

Sonic sobbed, "But I don't even like you at all! You're a sick little perverted boy with rabies! You should just let me go so I can go back and beat the snot out of Shadow again."

Chris rubbed at his chin, "Ah, yes, the black hedgehog... I had forgotten about him.. Maybe I should go get him so I'd feel complete."

"You should just replace me with him, he's a lot better, anyway..."

"Yeah... hmm... Alright! I'll be right back. You go nowhere. Hehehahahaha!" Chris jumped out the nearest window and ran.

Sonic relaxed himself for the time being. "..What to do now? Can't exactly escape with these damn ropes... I know! I'll sing! _...When all alone in my chair, I just go about wiiiishing..._"

During all that, Knuckles and Shadow decided to just skip on Robotnik's plans and run out through a jungle that was close by. ...Hey, it's Mobius, so why not?

Shadow whined as they were walking, "Knuckles, my feet hurt! Can we take a break? I want a snack, I'm hungry! Where are we going? Are we gonna get there any time soon? This is stupid! This entire trip is stupid! I could be back at Robotnik's base eating cookies right now! But no, you had to kidnap Sonic and make me go get him! I hate you and I wish I was never born!"

Knuckles turned around and smacked him, "Shut it, Shadow! You were the one who suggested that we go out here in the first place!"

Shadow sat down and started crying.

Knuckles stared, "H... hey! Don't cry! I'm sorry!"

"WAAAHAHAHA! You're so mean, Knuckles!"

The echidna sighed, then knelt down to hug the hedgehog. Shadow squealed and hugged back, his tail wagged like a dog's as they hugged.

Out of nowhere, a gust of wind ran right through them.

Knuckles shot his head quickly enough to see a figure running practically as fast as Sonic. "Wha..? What the hell was that?"

Shadow had fallen asleep during their hug and started drooling, "Ah.. no, Amy said she was gonna give more pancakes to the iguana.."

Knuckles looked down to Shadow and pushed him away, "Come on! That's just gross!"

Robotnik was at his computer playing Pong. "Man, this game sucks!" he threw the controller at the screen, causing it to blow up on him. "ARGGGGHHH!"

Just then, Chris came right back through the broken window that he had crashed in earlier. "Where is Shadow!"

Robotnik turned to see that demented child standing in his base, again. Why coudn't he just use the door like normal people? "Umm... he and Knuckles ran off to the Ice Caps or something."

Chris hadn't said another word. He just shot back out and ran directly to the Ice Caps. When he was there, he slipped and slid all along the Ice Caps. Once he was able to stop, he looked up to see a giant piece of ice fall and go right into his stomach. That was the end of Christopher Thorndyke, and no one will miss him.

Over to Sonic... Well, there isn't much for him. Nobody even really remembers that he was kidnapped by Chris. They all thought that he did something bad and got sent to prison. "_Whatever I want, I get.. I want, shouldn't stall. Whatever I need, I have when I'm with yooooou..."_

Shadow and Knuckles were going to go investigate that figure they saw, but they were both sidetracked when a catepillar fell ontop Shadow's head. By the time Knuckles smacked it off, they had forgotten what they were doing, so they decided to run some more.

Walking, walking... oh yes, they were walking... until they bumped into another body. Knuckles bumped first, Shadow behind him.

"Ah, what in the fuck are you fucking doing!" the being stood itself up and shook a fist in Knuckles' face.

At first glance he slightly resembled Sonic minus the quills. When Knuckles got his eyes to finally focus, he saw that it was no other than his old pal, Mighty the Armadillo. "...Mighty? What're you doing here?"

Shadow jumped forward and shoved himself in Mighty's face, "Ah! Ah! Who's this, Knuckles? Huh? Who is he?"

Mighty gently placed a hand on Shadow's forehead, then forced him roughly into the ground. "Who the hell're you supposed to be, a Sonic wannabe?"

Knuckles sat on the black hedgehog, who's body was underground, only his head exposed. "This is Shadow. Anyway, where's the rest of the Chaotix?"

Mighty snorted, "Hmph, they decided to shove me out of the team."

"And Ray?"

"Umm..." Mighty began to think, "I think he got run over by a car."

"Ah. How terrible."

"Yeah, but the funeral was lovely."

"Well, that's good, I guess."

"Yeah.."

They stood there for about five minutes, until Knuckles finally realized something.

"Oh! Mighty!" he stood up. "Can you help us grab Sonic back? He had gotten kidnapped by this kid, and..."

"Sonic? Say no more, let's go!"

It took them about twenty-seven minutes to get there. And oh, they had forgotten to get Shadow out of the ground. Mighty left Shadow there because he doesn't like him, and Knuckles mistook Shadow for a tree stump when he first sat on him. We'll leave him there for a while.

Sonic was still tied up. That must've been one hell of a tight rope... "_To the pressure, everything's just like an illusion... but I won't be losing out before long." _he continued to sing and began swaying his head and feet around.

Seconds later, Knuckles and Mighty came crashing through the nearby window that magically fixed itself in order to be crashed through again.

"Hoohah! We're here to save you, hedgehog!" the two said together, making a pose like a couple of fighters would do.

Sonic practically spit fire at them in anger, "You guys JUST NOW arrive? You know what I've been doing this whole time! Singing random songs, that's what! I even sang the annoying ones that no one likes! And oh my fuck, Mighty, what are you doing here?"

Mighty walked over to Sonic, "Bumped into Knuckles and some weird black hedgehog." he started to untie the ropes from the blue hedgehog.

Knuckles put his hands behind his head, "Ah... my footstool. I wonder where it went?" he began to ponder on this topic.

And so, the trio went back to Shadow's house. They went ahead and started playing the game Tomb Raider. Knuckles hid behind Sonic as Mighty played, because all the animals that randomly jumped out scared him.

Two hours into gameplay, and Shadow came bursting through the door. His entire lower body was covered in dirt and slightly dried up mud. His eyes shifted to the red and black armadillo, "You..."

Mighty threw down the controller to stand up to Shadow's height, "What about me?"

They stood there staring at eachother will a real look of hatred in their eyes. This'll go on until the next chapter, so it's kinda a cliffhanger.

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The songs that Sonic were singing were Believe in Myself, Follow Me, and Supporting Me.

Ahahaha... don't get angry at me, people, I like Mighty! And here I was actually going to introduce him in the next chapter... I don't think I'll add in the rest of the Chaotix, 'cause I'll have Espio fans biting my ass for the rest of my life. I dunno. Things can change.


	7. Shadow vs Charmy

Hedgehogs, Echidnas, and Foxes! Oh My!

Right now, I haven't anything better to do. xD But with my stories, it always seems like that. Anyway, I'm waiting for an eBay bid to end, which is in like, three hours. Crosses fingers. It's a video game, of course. I bought the game once before, but when it arrived it was out of the case and it wouldn't play, so I'm tryin' for another one. Yeah. Enough babbling, on with the story!

I don't own any Sonic characters, but I do own Frank.

QUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH.

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Mighty and Shadow were standing there, still glaring at eachother. Mighty had an intense glare, and Shadow was slowly starting to forget what was going on. Then, Shadow felt a little rumbly in his tumbly.

He looked down at this stomach, "Oh my God! Chaos Control!" he naturally said, then poofed from the current situation. Wait... why did he say Chaos Control if he doesn't have to?

Mighty walked back down and snatched the controller from Sonic's hands, "Well, that was stupid."

"What happened?" Sonic sighed, already missing the controller.

Mighty shrugged, "Shadow screamed something about a Chaos Control, then disappeared."

"Oh."

Now to Shadow. He appeared before a bakery store with his tail wagging at a rapid pace. Man, is he part dog or something? He skipped into the store.

"Hello, Bill!" he waved to the store clerk.

The clerk got angry, "How many times do I have to tell you that my name's Frank! You stupid hedgehog!"

Shadow started laughing, "Haha, you're so funny, Bill! Anyway, do you have those Super Chunky Chocolate Chip Cookies yet?"

Frank practically threw the box at him, "That'll be $3.75."

Shadow pulled out his manly coin purse, slowly pulling out five dollars and three quarters. "Will this cover it, Bill?"

Frank sighed, "Yes. And by the way, my name's Frank." he grabbed the money, then handed Shadow the appropriate change. "Now get out of my store and never come back."

Shadow laughed again as he grabbed the cookie box, "Damn, you gotta stop making me laugh. I'm gonna bust a gut! I'll see you tomorrow, Bill." he skipped out of the store and out onto his merry way.

Frank sighed, "If only.."

Shadow was skipping down along the sidewalk. He wiggled his butt in attempt to dance, but just looked like his butt was pulling him somewhere. "Oh, I love cookies! Yes I do! I love cookies, how 'bout you! I'll eat cookies, today and night, and I'll eat cookies.. uhh.. more tonight! Oh my cookies are so fun, they're so fun for everyone! I hate Sonic, yeah, I do... and I'm gonna put him in my stew! Wheee!" he slid along a nearby rail, then fell. "DAMNIT!"

Charmy had been flying around at that exact moment, and saw Shadow lying there in pain. Then he saw a box of cookies next to him and decided to head for those, "YAY! Today is my lucky day!" he quickly grabbed at the box.

A hand shot out and grabbed the box before he could fly off with it, "You touch my cookies and you die." Shadow got himself up, still holding the box.

Charmy tugged at the box, "Hey! Finder's keepers, loser's weepers!"

"What're you talking about! They were still in my sight! It doesn't count when I don't actually lose it!"

"Too bad! They're mine now, so buzz off!"

"Oh, bite me, I spentSonic's hard earned cash on that!"

They both dropped the box so they could get in a big ol' fight. Shadow swung a few punches and successfully hit, but then got a taste of Charmy's stinger. This'll really go on for a while, so let's skip the detail and go to Sonic and them.

"This sucks. Again." Sonic flew back and sighed. He also got his quills stuck in the ground, so he spent his time flailing his arms and legs around and crying.

"Nutmeg." Knuckles sighed depressingly.

Mighty raised a brow at Knux, "Are you addicted to crack or something?"

Knuckles gasped, ran to the couch, and buried his face in the pillows. Now Mighty has two crying babies to try to settle down!

"Great." he got up and smacked each of them on the back of the head, "SHUT IT. NOW."

Sonic and Knuckles sat there sliffling like crazy. That's when Shadow and Charmy came crashing through a window and onto Knuckles. They both had a hand on the box while they continued to fight.

"Argh! Give it back, you stupid bee!" Shadow bit one of those antenna things Charmy has.

"Ow! No! Give it to meeee!" Charmy continued to try to sting at Shad.

Mighty got a grasp on their faces and pushed them apart to get in the middle, "Hey! What the fuck is going on here!"

Shadow was trying to reach over to the box, but was couldn't do it because Mighty was just too strong. "I bought a box of cookies to save me from hunger, fell, then this little flying freak came up and took my box!"

Mighty looked to the other side of him to see his old friend, "Charmy? Why the hell're you trying to steal something?"

Charmy also tried to get past Mighty to get the box, "Well, I just found them there, and I wanted to eat them!"

"But that isn't what a member of the Chaotix does!"

"No, but it's what Charmy does!"

"Come on, Charmy, just let Shadow have the box. I'll buy you your own."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"With mint and honey and stuff?"

"Sure."

"Okay!" Charmy pulled back and gave the peace sign to Shadow, "Sorry man! I'm off!"

Shadow ignored his apology and just shot through to the cookies, then ran to a corner and ate the whole box. "Pigmy son of a bitch."

Mighty waved to Sonic and Knuckles, "Well, this is already a goodbye, so I'll see you bitches in hell."

Charmy stuck out his tounge, "Yeah! In hell!"

Mighty slapped Charmy, "Quiet, you." and with that, they were gone.

Sonic wailed, "Why hasn't anyone noticed that I'm still stuck to the ground? AHHHHH!" he tried to run as fast as possible, but that only got his body to rise in the air. "Nyeeeeh...!"

Knuckles' body had sunken halfway in the couch, no one noticed that, either. "I'd help you out, but I'm stuck and overly emotional at the moment." he sighed, "And I just remembered about the cat that I accidently killed! OH GOD!" he cried and cried and.. cried.

Tails decided to pick that moment to enter the room, "Hey guys! What's goin' on?"

He got blown back by the three screaming at him, "GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE." and unfortunately, the force was so strong that he smacked into the wall like a ton of bricks and died on the spot.

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There. xD A reviewer, whom's name I can't remember at the moment, gave me a small idea on what to do with this chapter. Said somethin' about Charmy stealin' Shadow's cookies or something. But, well, I thank you for that, guy!

I honestly couldn't think of what to do with this specific chapter, but it did make the time go by a bit quickly.


	8. Stupidity of Hedgehogs! Whoo!

Hedgehogs, Echidnas, and Foxes! Oh My!

By the Great Noma

Okay, people. By now, I have completely forgotten the storyline, and have gotten too lazy to go back and read it. Which is downright pathetic... anywho, since this story is already fucked up, I don't need to worry about keeping up with what happened last. And I think I got a bit more creative, so I should be able to come up with something good... SONIC AND ALL DA CREW BELONGZ TO DA SONIC TEEM PLZ.

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If something happened last time, forget it. Sonic, Knuckles and Shadow had all developed ADD, and spent their time running through fields. They picked flowers and threw them at Knuckles, who sat down and started crying 'n flailing.

"The flowers! THEY BURN!" he continued weeping.

Shadow turned around and quirked an eyebrow at the red freak, "...What the hell? NO. They do not. _I'm the dark and evil one, you cannot act like good hurts you!"_

Knuckles blinked, "But I was technically a baddie a few years ago..."

Sonic stopped and sat down to ponder, "...Yeah, that was weird... that was around the time when people kept taking control of my life, and forced me to run... but I got back at those bastards..." he started rubbing his hands together with an evil look in his eye. He was referring to the fact that sometimes, he gets caught in a glitch and falls through the floors that don't have holes... y'know?

They then just sat for about forty-five minutes, smiling and sighing... except Sonic, who kept making evil faces. Until, randomly, a space ship came down and crashed hard about five feet away from them. Shadow hid behind Sonic and started crying, up until Sonic slapped him. They walked over to the shuttle to see three mutants laying limp inside.

"OH MY GOD, CHICKEN!" Knuckles hopped in and began gnawing on the grey mutant's arm. It regained conciousness quickly, and looked down at Knux for a couple seconds before punching him away.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" it yelled, making Knuckles get teary-eyed.

"...You look like a chicken." he whispered.

The thing stood up, making itself quite a bit taller than Knuckles. "I'm no stupid chicken, idiot. I'm an albatross. My name's Storm." he said, pounding his chest and smiling in admiration of himself. He pointed to the other two freak shows, "Those are my unconcious friends, Jet and Wave. Together, we make the Babylon Rogues!"

Jet jumped up and grabbed Storm's beak, "You son of a bitch, you don't get to make introductions for us! _Only I do!"_

Sonic stepped in and started to inspect Jet, "You... look awfully familiar... like some other existing character that most likely won't be mentioned again... because making new characters is apperantly better than bringing back the classics..."

Jet eyed Sonic before pushing him away, "What the hell 're you talkin' about?"

Sonic looked at him dumbfoundedly, "...Err, what?"

"You just said something about old characters..."

"...I did?"

"...I'm pretty sure I did, unless I'm going insane.."

Sonic smiled brightly, "You're insane! Yeah! Most people go there when we're around!" he grabbed Shadow and Knuckles and hugged them very tightly.

Wave decided to step in, "Whatever... do you think you guys could help us? We don't know where we are, and..." she began saying before being interrupted.

"SAYYYYY... you're Sonic the Hedgehog, aren't you?" Jet jumped ontop of Wave and started going, "I hear that you're supposed to be all fast 'n shiz! You don't look fast! You just look retarded. I bet you go at a snail's pace compared to me, 'cause I'm Jet the Hawk! I'm the fastest there's ever been on a ghetto little hoverboard! Worship me! If I started a running race against you, I'd fail miserably, 'cause I don't know how to use my feet! I gotta use a board! I don't even know how to walk, look!" he shifted his leg out to start walking and automatically fell forward, slamming his beak in the floor and getting it stuck. Knuckles and Shadow pointed and laughed.

Sonic stood above him, "Dude... you're gay. Totally and completely gay. I don't even wanna _race _against you, 'cause your stupid, ugly face pisses me off so much..." he gave Jet a long, cold stare before he suddenly snapped and started smiling, "...What just happened?"

Knuckles stared at Sonic, "...I don't even know..."

Sonic grabbed Knuckles' and Shadow's wrists and walked out the door, "Well, it was nice meeting you, but you guys are boring! Bye bye!" he started skipping, Shadow looking back and giving them the finger. That was the last they'd seen those stupid birds... because the birds ended up getting in another, this time fatal, crash and went to hell, where Chris was waiting for them.

The trio then decided to spend their time at the grocery store, because Shadow recently ate all the food that Knuckles had at his house. Sonic was walking through the isles, pushing over random cans of soup and boxes of cereal that he looked at. Shadow was in the vegetable area spitting on everything, because he absolutely hates veggies. Knuckles was eating his body weight in fruit, because it was there and he hadn't eaten in eight days. When the workers saw this the three were automatically kicked out, leaving Knuckles without anything to eat in the future. He noticed that Shadow had a box of cookies and quickly ate the entire box, spitting rabies at Shadow, whom beat the living hell out of him.

Amy just happened to walk by and saw Sonic, so she grabbed him and ran at top speed. Shadow screamed and used Chaos Control, then ran up and began beating Amy's head with a metal baseball bat. Yeah, this whole part is pretty random and has nothing to do with the story, but still. It's fucking Amy for crying out loud.

By the time Shad was finished, Sonic and Knuckles had already gone home. He realized he was all alone in the city, next to a corpse, and so he fell over to start crying.

A policeman happened to drive by at that moment, stopping to look at the crying hedgehog, "You okay, son?"

"I... I don't know... I'm all alone and scared..." he wrapped his arms around himself and acted like he was cold.

The policeman looked at the corpse, seeing that it was Amy, and continued on with the conversation. "I see... well, would you like a ride home?"

Shadow sniffled and nodded, so the policeman opened up the door and let the hopping Shadow in.

"So... where do you live?"

Shadow was messing around with buttons, giggling like a toddler, "I dunno!"

"...How could you not know? You gotta live somewhere..."

"Oh, I know. I just forgot where it is."

"Well... what's your name?"

"Shadow the Hedgehog... I think."

The policeman stared, "Hey, you're that son of a bitch who went on a killing spree last year, aren't you?"

"Yeah... but I also saved the world, remember? All by myself, too!"

"Oh yeah... nevermind. I was gonna have you arrested."

"...You can still do that, y'know. I kinda killed Amy back there." he smiled brightly.

"But nobody cares about Amy... even though... it _is_ a murder... Yeah! I'll get a promotion! Shadow, you're under arrest!"

Shadow squealed and clapped, "Yay! Do I get a prize?"

"Sure! You can have these chained bracelets!"

"Oh boy! Gimme gimme gimme!"

The policemen handed Shadow the handcuffs, who put them on instantly. "Oooh... how do I look?"

"Like my ticket to fame..." the policeman laughed evilly, speeding off to the police department. By the way, I'm getting tired of typing policeman, so I'm gonna start calling him Frank.

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I hope you guys like this... It's obvious I haven't written my story in a while... Man, I apperantly like making Shadow the center of attention. BY THE WAY. I'm **deeply **considering putting a certain new hedgehog in this story... if y'all don't like it, tough shit, 'cause I like him a lot.

...And now you guys know... I hate the Babylon Rogues. xD


End file.
